Empress Keno

Once you get a certain car, you suddenly see that car everywhere? That is an act of manifestation. Now that something exists in your world, it exists in the world. Ever since I decided that freedom is the center of my world ; I see and feel avenues to contribute to my freedom in the world. Love that for me.

I made it through my first day back in office after my longest vacation to date. Not only did I manage to touch 5 of my accounts and their backlog but I was also gifted with the news of growth. I am very much being mindful of the amount of time and energy I'm pouring in to work, still. The goal with working for me has always been freedom. However, I serve groups of people that trust me with their livelihood so there's no time for too many etceteras.  Today, I preserved through physical and emotional discomfort to rise to the occasion that my responsibilities demand. I mean, that's not new by any means but I'm intentional about clapping for me. Empress Keno ; I'm proud of you girl.

I was trying to work today but I am incredibly SAD. Like, straight up boo hoo crying sad to be completely honest. In my defense, my body is PMSing really hard. Like, I've been waiting for my uterus to do the drop for a few days now. But also, the video I recorded last night was very transparent and very heavy. I think about my daughter everyday and I pray that she one day can understand why I had to choose me in this season. A large portion of my identity is being a mother. I have been an incredible mother to her, quite literally almost exchanging my life for hers on more than one occasion. No one, including her, knows what I have survived on her behalf.  I expected to break down and cry a Nile worth of tears when I first arrived. That never happened. I'm sure the overflow, the release that I am feeling now is a reflection of said anticipation. Everyday I send up prayers for her protection, for her forgiveness. Everyday, I get a little stronger. I am tired of being strong to be

I've really been growing and getting things off my chest with my self care talks on my YouTube channel. The edit I just finished took me 2 hours to export and is my most intimate yet. I cried three times reviewing the final production. Living in my truth out loud has truly set me free.  APTTMH